Theology of the Body – Page 4 – Ruah Woods Psychological Services

Posts

The Toxic Nature of Porn

June 19, 2023/in Introduction to Theology of the Body /by Dr. Andrew Sodergren

While recently discussing the issue of “shamelessness” in this series, I identified pornography as the most prevalent example in today’s culture. Last month, I began to answer the question of why should we make such a fuss over porn by pointing out how omnipresent it has become. Now I will discuss how psychological research shows us just how toxic porn is to the human person.

In an informative article, Jill Manning, Ph.D. reviewed much prior research on the effects of pornography on the viewer. [1] Going back to early studies conducted in the 1980s and extending to today, psychological research has consistently shown that viewing porn leads to changes in the consumer’s attitudes toward relationships and ability to enact healthy relationships. For example, porn consumption has been linked with increased difficulties in intimate relationships, more impersonal attitudes about sex, more permissive attitudes toward premarital and extramarital sex, devaluing monogamy, doubts about the value of marriage, decreased desire to have children, and higher rates of infidelity.

Porn also alters viewers’ perceptions of what is “normal” in a sexual relationship. Research shows that consuming porn tends to lead to distorted views about sexuality and the kinds of sexual behaviors that are acceptable to most people. The more porn one views, the more likely they are to develop an increased appetite for depictions of deviant or bizarre forms of sexuality.

Thirdly, research has consistently shown that when men view porn, it alters their attitudes and behavior toward women. Viewing porn tends to lead men to report decreased satisfaction with their current sexual partner. It also increases callousness toward women, trivialization of rape as a criminal offense, and greater belief in “rape myths” (the idea that a rape victim actually wanted and/or enjoyed the encounter). Porn also tends to lead to increased verbal and behavioral aggression, increased sexual aggression, and actual increased risk of sexual offending (i.e., illegal behavior).

Research with teens adds to this sordid list an awareness that when adolescents view porn, it tends to go hand in hand with greater emotional and behavioral problems, earlier sexual experimentation, greater sexual permissiveness, greater objectification of women, and higher risk of sexual aggression.[2]

All of this research pertains to the effects on porn users and their relationships. Often overlooked are the performers themselves, many of whom are enslaved to a system that exploits human beings, especially women and girls, for financial gain. Many come from broken homes and/or are abuse survivors who go on to experience further forms of severe trauma, addiction to drugs, and terrible physical and mental health outcomes.

While sad and alarming, none of this should come as a surprise. The Catechism clearly warns us that pornography “does grave injury to the dignity of its participants (actors, vendors, the public)” (no. 2354). Even more, Theology of the Body helps us see how depictions of the human body that reduce a person to a sexual object to be used and discarded, harms everyone involved. Before moving on to discuss Christ’s redemption of our bodies, I will discuss one final problem with porn: it’s addictive nature.

[1] Manning, J.C., (2006). The impact of Internet pornography on marriage and the family : A review of the research. Sexual Addiction & Compulsivity, 13, 131-165.
[2] Owens, E.W., et al. (2012). The impact of Internet pornography on adolescents: A review of the research. Sexual Addiction & Compulsivity, 19, 99-122.

Note: This article is part of a series of reflections on Pope St. John Paul II’s “Theology of the Body.”

Continue Reading: Porn Addiction: Enslaved to a Lie

Written by, Dr. Andrew Sodergren, M.T.S., Psy.D.,
Director of Ruah Woods Psychological Services

(Article originally published in The Catholic Telegraph, July 2023 Issue, the official magazine of the Archdiocese of Cincinnati)

Porn Addiction: Enslaved to a Lie

June 19, 2023/in Introduction to Theology of the Body /by Dr. Andrew Sodergren

In the last couple of articles, I have been exploring the scourge of pornography as a prime example of the problem of “shamelessness.” I previously discussed how porn is omnipresent today, toxic to body and soul, and, in this article, I will highlight its addictive nature.

For many years, medical and mental health professionals thought of “addiction” as only applicable to consuming chemical substances. However, in recent years, neuroscience has helped our understanding of addiction to evolve. We understand more about the mechanisms underlying addiction that involve the brain’s natural reward circuits, memory systems, endorphins (i.e., chemicals in the brain that induce euphoria), impairments to the executive control centers, and more. Researchers have now established that it is possible for an addicted brain state to occur without consuming a chemical agent. Certain behaviors (e.g., eating, gambling, sex) result in the release of pleasurable chemicals in the brain such that if they are repeated and intensified under certain conditions, an addiction can become established. [1]

Internet pornography is designed to capitalize on this potential for behavioral addiction. When a consumer, especially a man, views pornography, the sexual images activate the dopamine pathway in the brain that is involved in anticipation of pleasure, focused attention, and learning. Essentially, the brain becomes fixated on the image and associates it with the anticipation of pleasure. Physiological arousal is heightened, which intensifies learning. If sexual climax occurs in the viewer, the brain comes to associate the euphoric experience with pornography. The brain releases chemicals that normally promote bonding (e.g., prolactin and oxytocin), but in the case of viewing porn, these may serve to strengthen the false sense of connection with the pornographic fantasy. When this process is repeated, the brain becomes increasingly conditioned to seek and prefer pornography to other sources of enjoyment. In addition, changes occur in the brain’s dopamine reward system such that more and more pornographic stimulation is needed to get the same response previously experienced. Meanwhile, the executive control centers in the frontal lobe actually diminish, reducing self-control and thoughtfulness. The end result is a person who feels miserable most of the time due to the changes in their dopamine system, is preoccupied by sexual thoughts, experiences intense craving for porn and sexual behavior to feel better, and whose ability to resist is weakened over time.[2]

There are additional features of Internet pornography that make it especially addictive. Whereas in the past, one would have to go to a physical store, potentially interact with other humans, and pay money to obtain porn, the Internet has made pornography accessible, affordable, and potentially anonymous. One researcher referred to this as the “triple A” engine of Internet porn and likened it to crack cocaine in its addictive potential.[3]

Even more, Internet porn constitutes a “supernormal stimulus.” Nobel prize winner Niko Tinbergen coined this term to describe a phenomenon that he and other scientists discovered in their research on animal behavior. They found that they could manipulate animals’ natural instincts by presenting them with artificial stimuli that were exaggerated versions of familiar objects. For example, after presenting male butterflies with artificial mates with exaggerated colors and shapes similar to but more intense than those of real females, the researchers observed that the males preferred to direct their sexual advances toward the artificial butterflies than toward real females. The researchers were similarly able to manipulate the caregiving behavior of mother birds by presenting them with artificial stimuli that exaggerated the features of their own young, resulting in the mothers preferring the fake young to their actual chicks.[4]

This type of process is frequently at work in advertising and media today. We are bombarded with exaggerated stimuli designed to trigger our instincts in order to capitalize off our cravings. Pornography is a prime example. By presenting anomalously attractive bodies engaged in extreme sexual activities and situations, pornographers are manipulating our natural instinct toward sexual union to crave the exaggerated, artificial fantasy world of porn.

As we have seen, pornography is destructive to human beings and human society. It presents a counterfeit version of the intimacy for which we are created. While our fallen nature can make us susceptible to such lies, Christ died to redeem us and show us the way to freedom. In future articles, I will explore Pope St. John Paul II’s reflections on purity of heart and our call to true spousal love. With the saintly pope as our guide, let us confidently follow the path that Jesus has prepared for us.

[1] Hilton & Watts (2011). Pornography addiction: A neuroscience perspective. Surgical Neurology International, 2:19.
[2] Struthers, W. M. (2009). Wired for intimacy: How pornography hijacks the male brain. InterVarsity Press.
[3] Cooper, A. (1998). Sexuality and the Internet: Surfing into the new millennium. CyberPsychology & Behavior, 1(2), 187–193.
[4] Love et al. (2015). Neuroscience of Internet pornography addiction: A review and update. Behavioral Sciences, 5, 388-433.

Note: This article is part of a series of reflections on Pope St. John Paul II’s “Theology of the Body.”

Continue Reading: Redeemed and Called by Christ

Written by, Dr. Andrew Sodergren, M.T.S., Psy.D.,
Director of Ruah Woods Psychological Services

(Article originally published in The Catholic Telegraph, August 2023 Issue, the official magazine of the Archdiocese of Cincinnati)

Redeemed and Called by Christ

June 19, 2023/in Introduction to Theology of the Body /by Dr. Andrew Sodergren

For the last several months of our journey through TOB, we have explored the effects of our first parents’ fall from grace. We explored the nature of their sin and how it disrupted the harmony they previously experienced with God, within themselves, with each other, and with the rest of creation. As a result, concupiscence (i.e., disordered desire) and shame became hallmarks of our human experience. Having reviewed the various aspects and causes of shame as well as its positive, protective value in a fallen world, we delved into the problem of shamelessness and the most notorious example of shamelessness today — pornography. It is now time, with the help of Pope St. John Paul II, to shift our gaze from our origin and fall to our redemption and call to glory.

Indeed, if the story of the human person and human love ended with sin, it would be a very bleak tale. Thanks be to God that He did not abandon us to the power of sin and death but fashioned a remedy for us out of our own humanity. Jesus Christ, the Son of God and Second Person of the Blessed Trinity, took on our human nature, becoming like us in all things but sin, suffered and died for our sake, and rose to eternal glory. As the fathers of the Second Vatican Council taught,

“He Who is ‘the image of the invisible God’ is Himself the perfect man. To the sons of Adam He restores the divine likeness which had been disfigured from the first sin onward. Since human nature as He assumed it was not annulled, by that very fact it has been raised up to a divine dignity in our respect too. For by His incarnation the Son of God has united Himself in some fashion with every man. He worked with human hands, He thought with a human mind, acted by human choice and loved with a human heart. Born of the Virgin Mary, He has truly been made one of us, like us in all things except sin” (Gaudium et spes, 22).

Christ indeed has united Himself with us, taking on our human nature in its entirety and uniting it with His divinity forever. In doing so, He has revealed to us anew our worth in God’s eyes and raised our dignity to an unprecedented level. As the Council fathers said, this dignity even includes the human body. Indeed, Pope St. John Paul II quipped, “Through the fact that the Word of God became flesh, the body entered theology… I would say, through the main door” (TOB 23:4). The human body has become theological, the meeting place between God and humanity.

By taking on our human nature, suffering and dying for us, and rising to eternal glory, Jesus has also opened the path to sanctity for us. Throughout His earthly ministry, He called His disciples to holiness of life. His preaching and example established the New Law of the Gospel as the standard for all human conduct, especially for those who bear the name Christian. This New Law “fulfills, refines, surpasses, and leads the Old Law to its perfection” (CCC, 1967). By giving us this law and empowering us to fulfill it with the grace of the Holy Spirit, Jesus provided the path and the means for all of us to achieve holiness and enter into eternal life.

Pope St. John Paul II frequently recalled the teaching of the Second Vatican Council known as the “universal call to holiness.” He adamantly taught that holiness — indeed, sainthood — is possible for each and every one of us and is, in fact, an essential aspect of everyone’s vocation. None of us are exempt from this call, nor is it impossible for us to achieve it with the abundant help of God’s grace. In TOB, he particularly explored the implications of Christ’s redemption, the New Law of the Gospel, and the call to holiness for the relationship between the sexes and our experience of spousal love. I invite you to continue this journey through TOB with me as we explore in subsequent articles the late pope’s precious insights into our moral life in Christ and the redemption of our bodies.
[3] Cooper, A. (1998). Sexuality and the Internet: Surfing into the new millennium. CyberPsychology & Behavior, 1(2), 187–193.
[4] Love et al. (2015). Neuroscience of Internet pornography addiction: A review and update. Behavioral Sciences, 5, 388-433.

Note: This article is part of a series of reflections on Pope St. John Paul II’s “Theology of the Body.”

Continue Reading: The Gift of the Moral Law

Written by, Dr. Andrew Sodergren, M.T.S., Psy.D.,
Director of Ruah Woods Psychological Services

(Article originally published in The Catholic Telegraph, September 2023 Issue, the official magazine of the Archdiocese of Cincinnati)

The Gift of the Moral Law

June 19, 2023/in Introduction to Theology of the Body /by Dr. Andrew Sodergren

In the second major part of TOB, Pope St. John Paul II guides us in exploring the implications of our redemption in Christ and the moral teaching of the New Testament for the relationship between the sexes and our call to spousal love. Before we can delve into this teaching, it is helpful to pause and ponder an essential but overlooked question: What is the purpose of the moral law?

In our modern age, law is typically seen in a distorted way as purely an instrument of control. In the best case scenario, some may see it as imposed for the sake of social order, but in the worst case, it is seen as merely a tool by those in power to maintain their position. In addition, we live in an increasingly relativistic age that rejects belief in moral absolutes, making each person the sole arbiter of right and wrong. Indeed, we regularly hear references to “your truth” and “my truth” as if truth could be different from one person to the next.

These views of the moral law pervade our culture and even infect the hearts and minds of many Catholics. If we make an honest examination, we may discover that we are embarrassed by Catholic moral teaching. We may outwardly profess to be good Catholics and faithful followers of Jesus, but when difficult moral issues come up, we distance ourselves from the teachings of the Church and hope that the topic of discussion will just go away. A complacent attitude of “well, the official teaching of the Church is _____, but only extremist / fanatical / rigid / ultra-traditional people live that way” creeps into our hearts and grows like a cancer, slowly cutting us off from the life of God within us.

When we look at the moral law in this distorted way, we can only see it as an arbitrary burden imposed on us for nefarious purposes (e.g., to control us, to make us miserable, etc.). Even more, our distorted, relativistic thinking often conceals and enables attachment to sin. These two forces work together to lead us to despise the moral law because it calls us to reform our lives. As Pope St. John Paul II said in his great encyclical on the moral life, Veritatis splendor, “Those who live ‘by the flesh’ experience God’s law as a burden, and indeed as a denial or at least a restriction of their own freedom” (no. 18). As a result, we begin to see the moral law as a threat to our freedom from which we must protect ourselves. We regard it with a sense of suspicion, resentment, and even outright hostility.

All our hearts are in need of purification from attachment to sin and the distorted, relativistic thinking of our culture. To this end, I invite us all to meditate on Psalm 119 in which the inspired psalmist beautifully pours out his deep love, thankfulness, and even yearning for God’s law. He speaks of it as sweeter than honey, finer than gold, greater than riches, the source of his comfort, the song of his house, and the delight of his heart. If we see it rightly, with pure eyes, this would be the natural response of our hearts toward all of Catholic moral teaching.

In reality, the moral law is not an imposition or a burden. Nor is it a restriction of our freedom. Rather, the moral law is one of our loving Father’s greatest gifts to us. It is meant to ensure and enhance our freedom by protecting us from ways of living that harm us. Sin is the true threat to our freedom for “everyone who commits sin is a slave to sin” (Jn 8:34). As St. Paul reminds us, “For freedom Christ has set us free; stand fast therefore, and do not submit again to a yoke of slavery” (Gal 5:1).

Our Father loves us so much that, through Christ and His Church, He has given us the fullness of the moral law so, as we pray in the Serenity Prayer, we “may be reasonably happy in this life and supremely happy with Him forever in the next.” As we meditate on Jesus’ moral teachings in future articles, let us ever remember His tender words about the true purpose of the moral law:

“If you keep my commandments, you will abide in my love, just as I have kept my Father’s commandments and abide in His love. These things I have spoken to you, that my joy may be in you, and that your joy may be full” (Jn 15:10-11).

Continue Reading: The Law of the Heart

Dr. Sodergren’s Introduction to Theology of the Body: A Collection of Articles from the Catholic Telegraph

Written by, Dr. Andrew Sodergren, M.T.S., Psy.D.,
Director of Ruah Woods Psychological Services

(Article originally published in The Catholic Telegraph, October 2023 Issue, the official magazine of the Archdiocese of Cincinnati)

The Law of the Heart

June 19, 2023/in Introduction to Theology of the Body /by Dr. Andrew Sodergren

By taking on our human nature in the Incarnation, Jesus, the eternal Son of the Father, united himself intimately with us. He did this in order to save us from sin, to reveal the Father and His love, to give us an example of holiness to follow, and ultimately, to enable us to share in the divine life of the Blessed Trinity (see CCC, 457-460). In his Theology of the Body, Pope St. John Paul II was especially interested in the implications of our redemption in Christ, the New Law of the Gospel, and our call to holiness for how we regard our bodies, our sexuality, and how we relate with one another. To help us enter into his reflections, we first pondered the universal call to holiness and the purpose of the moral law. We saw that with the grace that Christ won for us — and continually supplies through His bride, the Church — sanctity is not only possible for each and every one of us but is the standard of life for every Christian.

In the previous article, we reflected on the purpose of the moral law. At various times, we can all experience suspicion, resentment, or even embarrassment of Catholic moral teaching. However, if we have the eyes to see it, the moral law is actually an amazing gift of love given to us by our generous, loving Father. He desires us to enjoy our freedom and creativity in this life and has given us the moral law — expressed in its fullest form in Catholic moral teaching — so that we do not fall into the slavery of sin. He desires to help safeguard and enhance our freedom so that we can shape our lives in ways that are truly befitting of our dignity as sons and daughters of God and will lead us to eternal communion with Him. In this way, the moral law is actually centered on our happiness — both in this life and in eternity.

During His earthly ministry, Jesus brought the Old Law to fulfillment through his example and teaching. In doing so, He gave us the New Law of the Gospel, which “is the perfection here on earth of the divine law, natural and revealed.” It is “expressed particularly in the Sermon on the Mount” (CCC, 1965). There, the Lord repeatedly uses the form “you have heard that it was said… but I say to you…” (see Matt 5). To make his purpose absolutely clear, he prefaces these sayings with the statement, “Do not think that I have come to abolish the Law or the Prophets; I have not come to abolish them but to fulfill them” (Matt 5:17).

Within these sayings in the Sermon on the Mount, our Lord shows us that the moral law is about more than just external actions. External actions and overt obedience are very important, but they mean little if they do not reflect the true attitudes of our heart. Our inner attitudes, intentions, and desires matter just as much if not more. For example, Jesus teaches us that it is not enough for us to refrain from killing others. Rather, we must root out disordered anger, resentment, and unforgiveness. Jesus calls us, his disciples, to a level of holiness that involves the whole person, even the depths of the heart. Thus, the New Law of the Gospel is truly a law of the heart. Through it, Jesus shows us that the Father loves us so much that He desires not mere slaves who robotically follow “the rules.” Rather, He longs for our hearts to be intimately united with Him so that we can be liberated from sinful attitudes and experience the “glorious freedom of the children of God” (Rom 8:21).

Jesus calls all of us to continual conversion of heart. He invites us to look within and to discern where we need healing and conversion. Pope St. John Paul II saw this task as central to the Christian life and especially crucial for us to arrive at a mature, integrated sexuality whereby we can relate with one another in a way befitting human persons made in God’s image. He recognized that looking within to pursue deeper holiness is daunting. This is why he sought, in his first public remarks as pope, to encourage us: “Do not be afraid. Open wide the doors for Christ… Do not be afraid. Christ knows ‘what is in man.’ He alone knows it… He alone has words of life, yes, of eternal life.” With Pope St. John Paul II as guide, let us delve deeply into the human heart inviting the light of Christ to reveal all that needs to be purified.

Continue Reading: Adultery of the Heart — Part 1

Dr. Sodergren’s Introduction to Theology of the Body: A Collection of Articles from the Catholic Telegraph

Written by, Dr. Andrew Sodergren, M.T.S., Psy.D.,
Director of Ruah Woods Psychological Services

(Article originally published in The Catholic Telegraph, November 2023 Issue, the official magazine of the Archdiocese of Cincinnati)

Adultery of the Heart — Part 1

June 19, 2023/in Introduction to Theology of the Body /by Dr. Andrew Sodergren

Jesus came not to abolish the law and the prophets but to fulfill them (Matt 5:17). Through His teaching and example, the Lord has called us, His disciples, to a level of sanctity that goes beyond what the Old Law prescribed: “For I tell you, unless your righteousness exceeds that of the scribes and Pharisees, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven” (Matt 5:20). External conformity to the demands of the moral law is not sufficient. Jesus desires not only our exterior obedience, but even more, our interior conversion of heart.

In his Theology of the Body, Pope St. John Paul II explored this call to conversion of heart in light of the New Law of the Gospel and the perennial attraction between the sexes. In particular, he took as his starting point Matthew 5:27-28 in which we read, “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’ But I say to you that every one who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.”

Adultery was a very important concept in the Old Testament. Not only was it explicitly forbidden in the Ten Commandments, adultery was also a frequent image used to describe Israel’s unfaithfulness to the Old Covenant. In many of the prophetic books of the Old Testament (e.g., Hosea, Ezekiel 15, etc.), Israel is portrayed as an unfaithful bride who repeatedly turns aside from her husband (Yahweh), giving herself over to other spouses through adultery and even prostitution. These adulterous lovers are the various idols and pagan religious practices that crept into the life of the Israelites at different points in their history as well as their lack of consistency in following the obligations of the Mosaic Law.

Despite this prophetic tradition, the Israelites made certain accommodations when it came to how they understood marriage such as the possibility of divorce and limited acceptance of polygamy. Jesus challenged their “hardness of heart” (Matt 19:8), indicating that these concessions were not part of God’s original plan nor are they part of the Kingdom of God He came to establish. Jesus further renewed belief in the indissolubility and exclusivity of marriage and supernaturally fulfilled them through His spousal gift of self to the Church. Subsequently, the sixth commandment (“you shall not commit adultery,” Ex 20:14, Deut 5:18) came to be understood as protecting the sanctity of marriage by proscribing all sinful uses of the sexual faculty.

According to Pope St. John Paul II, “Adultery indicates the act by which a man and a woman who are not husband and wife form ‘one flesh’” (TOB 37:6). When we engage in sexual acts outside of a marriage covenant, we violate the purpose of our sexual faculty to form, through bodily self-giving, a visible sign of the communion of persons in marriage. Our sexual faculty is intimately connected with the spousal meaning of the body, which reveals that our bodies are apt to express a total gift of self, and the only appropriate “place” for this total gift of self is in a (permanent, exclusive) marriage between a man and a woman.

Our Lord not only affirms the immorality of using the sexual faculty outside of marriage, but as Pope St. John Paul II emphasized, shifts the “center of gravity” in his moral teaching to the level of our hearts. Exterior acts of adultery are clearly immoral according to both the Old Law and the New Law of the Gospel, but our call to holiness goes further. Jesus speaks in Matthew 5 of adultery of the heart. How are we to understand this adultery committed in the heart, and what does it have to do with lustful looking?

In TOB, Pope St. John Paul II went on to engage in a penetrating analysis of the human heart to enlighten our understanding of these matters. In the next few installments in this series, we will mine his insights so that we can more accurately discern the movements of our hearts as we strive to follow Jesus faithfully.

Dr. Sodergren’s Introduction to Theology of the Body: A Collection of Articles from the Catholic Telegraph

Written by, Dr. Andrew Sodergren, M.T.S., Psy.D.,
Director of Ruah Woods Psychological Services

(Article originally published in The Catholic Telegraph, December 2023 Issue, the official magazine of the Archdiocese of Cincinnati)

A Psychological Interpretation of Genesis 2:24
by Dr. Emily Dowdell

November 30, 2022/in Blog /by Dr. Emily Dowdell

“Therefore, a man leaves his father and his mother and cleaves to his wife, and they become one flesh.”

In Pope St. John Paul II’s Theology of the Body, he begins with Genesis. What better way to tell the story of what it means to be human then to start at the beginning. In the Creation account, it is revealed that man was not meant to be alone, and God created a suitable helper for him. The relationship between the man and the woman was designed to be one of mutuality and complementarity. There were significant differences, yet they existed in harmony and complemented one another.

One of the goals of Christian marriage is to rediscover that original unity between Adam and Eve, through sacrifice, self-gift, and a shared movement toward holiness. Yet often, couples find themselves feeling isolated and alone, experiencing solitude and even despair within their relationships. The idea of marital unity can seem so far off, like a distant dream, when the day-to-day interactions are grating. In Love & Responsibility, Pope St. John Paul II (Karol Wojtyla) wrote:

True love, a love that is internally complete, is one in which we choose the person for the sake of the person, — that in which a man chooses a woman or a woman chooses a man not just as a sexual partner but as the person on whom to bestow the gift of his or her own life. It is put to the test most severely when the sensual and emotional reactions themselves grow weaker, and sexual values as such lose their effect. Nothing then remains except the value of the person, and the inner truth about the love of those concerned comes to light. If their love is a true gift of self, so that they belong, each to the other, it will not only survive but grow stronger and sink deeper roots. Whereas if it was never more than a sort of synchronization of sensual and emotional experiences, it will lose its raison d’etre and the person involved will suddenly find themselves in a vacuum.

Ideally, when a man and woman enter a marital relationship, they are doing so freely and are able to make a full gift of themselves. Sometimes, however, this is not the case. As Pope St. John Paul II wrote in Theology of the Body, in order to give yourself, you must first have some sense of self-ownership.

Some psychologists like to focus on “the unconscious” in their work and believe that the goal of individual therapy is to bring the things that are outside the person’s awareness into view. These are the therapists that like to ask, “so, tell me about your mother…” There is a sense that if we can become more aware of our true intentions, motivations, and desires, we can make more informed decisions and increase ownership of our choices. To uncover the truth about ourselves, we go back to the beginning, to our origin stories.

When we carry unresolved pain from our past in our unconscious, we can react to our current relationships and life events from a place of fear and self-protection without even realizing it. There is a defense system in place to keep negative past experiences from recurring. It is a very natural process. As a kid, you touched the stove and found out that it burns, and you will never touch it again… In our interactions with our parents as children, we were constantly using them as a sounding board, taking in and adapting to their feedback, and learning how to be. Our parents were not perfect people and sometimes their reactions were not the most reliable. In such cases, we developed beliefs and reactions that may have helped us navigate childhood, but do not generalize well into adulthood. The journey of self-mastery involves untangling the past from the present, recognizing when we’re reacting based on our history instead of the here-and-now. In order to be fully present to the person in front of me, I need to see the reactions that are coming from my own unmet needs or history and make a conscious choice to reorient myself to the person before me. It is a brave and difficult thing to explore some of the dark corners of your story, but once illuminated the fear no longer reigns.

So what does all this have to do with Genesis 2:24? My working theory is that most marital conflict is rooted in an inability to see past an original wound and truly orient to the other person. Maybe I’m reacting to something my spouse said and interpreting it through a lens colored by my past experience. That coloration, while true to my experience, may affect my ability to see my spouse’s intentions clearly or interpret them accurately. I’ll give you a personal example. My dad was not around very much when I was young. That generated an assumption in my mind that men are naturally selfish. For a longtime, I had no idea that I even had that assumption, never mind that I was using it to interpret the behavior of all the men in my life. You can imagine how that filter might affect my interpretation, in moments when my husband would choose to do something for himself, instead of for our family. Thankfully, I’ve learned to identify when that thought-train is leaving the station and choose to reorient myself to my spouse – who by the way is incredibly devoted to family – and see that in the moments he’s choosing something for himself, it’s to replenish and rest, to make himself more available to us in the future. What a different reality! So, I like to think that to leave the father and mother and cleave to the spouse, can speak to that process of untangling the past from the present, ultimately restoring the freedom needed to fully commit to loving the person before me in the present moment.

Bringing John Paul II into Couples’ Communication
by Dr. Emily Dowdell

October 26, 2022/in Blog /by Dr. Emily Dowdell

One of the reasons I am excited to be a part of the RWPS team is our commitment to making the philosophy of Pope St. John Paul II and his Theology of the Body more accessible. One area in which we do this is in marital therapy.

Couples experiencing marital distress are almost always struggling with a breakdown in communication. One or both parties feel misunderstood, and they often find themselves in a power struggle. When couples get locked into these cycles of interaction, they lose sight of their shared humanity, and the love they have for one another. Each person digs their heels into their own individual experiences and demands authority. Many times, the desire for power or authority comes from a deeper desire to be known, heard, and understood at the heart of which is a longing for closeness and a fear of rejection or abandonment. When working with couples who run into these struggles, I often provide this analogy:

Imagine you and your significant other are standing at the top of a long driveway at dusk. You can’t quite make out what’s happening at the bottom. You see two figures walking past the lamppost and share your observations with each other. One of you sees a couple on a nice evening stroll, the other fears someone is being stalked and in danger.  The two of you argue about who is right, adamant about your observations and opinions. You stay at the top of the driveway and try to convince one another that you really know what’s going on down there. Yet, neither of you have enough information. If we strip away the power struggle, we might have a more balanced interaction. Instead of arguing about who is right, you might be curious about each other’s perceptions. When you seek to understand the other person’s perspective, you might learn that the one who feels fear was once assaulted from behind. The one who saw an evening stroll finds going for walks in the evening romantic. After learning about each other and why you see the world as you do, you might decide to get a little closer to find out what is really going on at the bottom of the driveway.  As you get closer, you could discover that you were both wrong, and it was your neighbor and his son walking their dog.

In this event, there is an opportunity for the spouses to learn more about one another and their shared reality. One of the beautiful things about the philosophy of Pope St. John Paul II is that he made space for subjective experience without denying objective truth. Some philosophies that aim to honor individual experience can go to an extreme and abandon the notion of an objective reality— we see this in the common phrase “follow your truth” and other mottos based in moral relativism. On the other hand, other philosophies are more rigid about following the rules and impose an objective framework that fails to take into account each person’s subjective experience.  Pope St. John Paul II found a way to recognize the both—and. He affirmed the unique experiences that form our individual thoughts, beliefs, and opinions and asserted that we are interacting with an objective, shared reality. We have a moral obligation to pursue truth and to refrain from treating others as an object, yet we also must respect and honor each other’s subjectivity.

When we orient ourselves to the pursuit of objective truth — about ourselves and others — in a way that respects our subjective viewpoints, we can experience more harmonious relationships and experience more interior freedom and peace. As in the example above, instead of becoming entrenched in protecting one’s ego, defending oneself and one’s view as “correct” and alienating one’s significant other in the process, we can take a curious stance with oneself, one’s spouse, and the shared reality. In doing so, one might come to realize that, while one’s assumptions about reality were inaccurate, they were coming from a lived experience, thus not invalid. Becoming entrenched in one’s own view becomes problematic when one lacks insight into one’s perspective, presumes to have all the answers, cites assumptions as facts, and refuses to dialogue with oneself, others, and the world.  

If I am approaching a conversation with my husband looking for a certain response — perhaps I am looking for support, validation, or encouragement — and he does not respond in the way I expected, this can indeed be quite disappointing. I might spiral into thoughts about what this means about our marriage or become angry because I feel entitled to the response I wanted.  If instead, I have the awareness to recognize my need, see that I was treating my husband as a source of need-fulfillment, and instead seek to treat him as a person, this changes the dynamic. I can recognize my need, acknowledge my disappointment, and be curious about both of our reactions. I wish I was always able to “put my bags down” in conversations and focus on the good of the other, but sometimes it’s really hard.

If you or your spouse is struggling to communicate, becoming overwhelmed with strong emotions in conversation, and is unable to be curious — it may be a sign of woundedness and a source of difficulty in your life. There is likely a lot of pain and suffering there, which deeply needs compassion. We are here to help. By learning to understand yourself and your spouse more deeply, as well as healing underlying wounds that trip us up in our relationships, the RWPS team will walk with you as you seek the healing and growth in your capacity for love. It is also important to remain compassionate with yourself and your spouse through these struggles. We all struggle in our vocations and need the healing power of God’s grace and the support of others to live our vocations fully and faithfully. In our struggles, we find the prayer of St. Francis a helpful reminder of our calling to seek the good of the other: “O divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console, to be understood as to understand, to be loved as to love.”

Dr. Emily Dowdell, the Latest Therapist to Join the RWPS Team

September 26, 2022/in News /by Dr. Andrew Sodergren

We are excited to announce the addition of Dr. Emily Dowdell to the RWPS team. She brings with her an exceptional training background, solid Catholic formation, and unique clinical experience. Dr. Emily will be seeing patients at our main office on the West Side of Cincinnati. She recently sat down with us to share a bit about herself.

Q: Can you tell us about yourself?

I’m Dr. Emily Dowdell. I’m originally from Rhode Island, born and raised Catholic. I am currently married with three boys under four years old. I earned a bachelor’s degree in multimedia communications with minors in film studies and theology from Franciscan University of Steubenville. After college, I returned to Rhode Island where I worked as a barista, rock climbing instructor, dog walker, trivia hostess, and freelance graphic designer while building my own wedding photography business. Just as my photography business took off and I had booked twenty-three weddings for the year, the Lord had other plans… He introduced me to the Institute for the Psychological Sciences at Divine Mercy University in Virginia.

During my doctoral training in psychology, I worked in a variety of settings. My first experience was providing social skills training to youth and adults with severe autism in a community integration program. I then went on to work with adolescent girls, providing groups and individual treatment in a residential addiction program through Phoenix House. I spent a year focusing on diagnostics and assessments at the Psychiatric Institute of Washington, a private psychiatric hospital in D.C.

For my internship and postdoctoral years, I was a fellow at Riverview Psychiatric Center the primary state hospital for the state of Maine. While there I had the opportunity to work with both civil and forensically committed individuals with more extreme psychiatric conditions. I facilitated groups, provided individual therapy, and offered psychological testing.

I went on to work with the CatholicPsych Institute in their Rhode Island office providing individual therapy and mentorship. There I became the Director of Assessments, offering psychological testing for diocesan and religious discerners.

Q: What inspired you to become a psychologist?

I was fortunate to participate in Franciscan University’s study abroad program in Austria. While staying in an old Carthusian Monastery, I had the opportunity to study philosophy and travel to many spiritual pilgrimage sites. I learned about Pope Saint John Paul II’s philosophy of the human person that inspired Theology of the Body and read Viktor Frankl’s book, Man’s Search for Meaning. Learning about the dignity of the human person as created in the image of God was huge for my own self-understanding in early adulthood. When I heard about the Institute for the Psychological Sciences at DMU and how their program is designed to integrate the science of psychology with a Catholic view of the human person, I was very intrigued. Finally, I had found an opportunity to learn how to help others learn about and cooperate with their innate dignity.

Q: What does it mean to you to integrate the practice of psychology and the Catholic faith?

My faith informs everything I do and how I see the world. It’s important to acknowledge that every approach to psychology has philosophical roots and an understanding of what it means to be human at its core. The Catholic vision of the human person offers a more holistic foundation, incorporating the person’s mind, body, and spirit. I want to see and work with the whole person, so it gives me a more balanced perspective when one aspect of the person’s life is out of sync. When working with clients who are or have experienced significant pain and suffering, my faith provides meaning. It anchors the work and gives me the hope I need to continue moving forward. My faith provides me greater clarity, orients me, and gives me a framework to better understand my clients. I ultimately entrust the Lord with the care of my clients and pray that they are receiving what they need at this time to move forward, toward becoming who God made them to be.

Q: What types of patients and difficulties do you treat?

Over the course of my training and experience I have provided individual, group, family, and marital therapy. I am most in my element working with individuals (adolescent through older adulthood) as they navigate a variety of challenges including: depression, anxiety, grief and loss, adjustment related issues, post/peripartum disorders, relational issues, vocational and identity concerns, trauma-related disorders, substance use and other addiction, and personality disorders.

Q: How would you describe your approach to therapy?

I approach therapy primarily from a relational perspective, meaning I focus on building a relationship with my clients. In terms of practice and conceptualization, I integrate different theories and tools from psychodynamic schools of thought (Nancy McWilliams, Lorna Benjamin, Peter Fonagy, Edward Teyber) and evidence-based treatments like Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, and Mindfulness. Regardless of the specifics, therapy always comes back to the individual. As we build our relationship, we will establish goals, and I will select the most relevant approach that suits the person and his or her individual needs.

Q: What do you like to do for fun?

For fun, I like to spend time with my three kids and husband. We enjoy spending time outdoors together and going on little adventures. I also enjoy knitting.

To learn more or to make an appointment with Dr. Emily, please call 513-407-8878.

Happy Birthday Papa
by Dr. Andrew Sodergren

May 19, 2020/in Blog /by Dr. Andrew Sodergren

This May 18^th is the 100^th anniversary of the birth of our beloved Pope St. John Paul II. Typically, only people who have had a truly historic impact have their birthdays celebrated long after they are deceased. John Paul II was one such historic person. I would like to reflect briefly on some of the long-lasting impact he has had and will continue to have on the Church as well as some of the impact he has had on me personally.

For many younger people today, it is difficult to truly appreciate the immensity of John Paul II’s impact on the Church. To put his pontificate in context, we have to recall the significance of the Second Vatican Council (1962-1965). Ecumenical councils are rare and only called when the Church needs to face major challenges in its mission. Vatican II, as it is often named, was in many ways an attempt to bring the First Vatican Council to completion as it was cut short by the Franco-Prussian war. The scope of Vatican II was immense: nothing less than reexamining the relationship of the Church with the modern world. As a newly ordained auxiliary bishop and later Archbishop of Kraków, Karol Wojtyła participated in all four sessions of the Council. His stature and reputation as an outspoken, courageous young bishop of immense intellect grew to the point where he was appointed to the committee that drafted what became perhaps the Council’s defining document, the Pastoral Constitution on the Church in the Modern World (Gaudium et spes).

Inspired by this experience, Archbishop Wojtyła became the only participating bishop to write an entire book summarizing the teaching of the Council and giving guidelines for its implementation (Sources of Renewal). Not long after, Pope Paul VI named him a Cardinal of the Church, perhaps as a way of thanking him for his contributions at the Council and for serving as a key theological advisor in preparing the encyclical letter Humanae vitae (1968), which dealt with thorny questions concerning marriage, sexuality, and birth control and reaffirmed the traditional Catholic teaching that sexuality is meant to unite a man and woman in marriage and must always be open to life.

It is difficult today to imagine the shock that the Church and even the world experienced when Cardinal Wojtyła was elected to the papacy in October 1978 and took the name John Paul II. He was the first non-Italian Pope in 455 years, and he hailed from – at that time – a communist country (Poland). This alone would make his an historic pontificate, but it was only the beginning. Whereas his predecessor, John Paul I, reigned for merely a month, John Paul II reigned for over 26 years, making his the third longest pontificate in the history of the Church. He accepted his mission from Christ to serve as the Church’s principal interpreter and implementer of the Second Vatican Council as well as to lead the Church into the Third Millennium. He did so with courage and faithfulness.

There is hardly an aspect of the Church’s life that was not impacted in significant ways by the teaching and leadership of this saintly Pope. Under his guidance, the Church produced a new Code of Canon Law governing all major aspects of ecclesial life. Later came the Catechism of the Catholic Church, the first universal catechism since the Council of Trent. It will remain for generations “a sure norm for teaching the faith.”[1] Among his many gifts to the Church include is 14 encyclical letters, 14 apostolic exhortations, and thousands of speeches, audiences, and other documents. His writings covered everything from the Persons of the Trinity; evangelization; the dignity of the human person; social issues such as the dignity of work, distribution of resources, and human rights; priests, bishops, consecrated religious, and the laity; marriage and family; the Eucharist; Mary; the rosary; sin, mercy, and reconciliation; fundamental principles for morality; and much more. Incredibly, he canonized 482 new saints and beatified 1338 new blesseds. He gave us the Luminous Mysteries of the rosary and instituted Divine Mercy Sunday. Liturgically, he oversaw the reform of the reform, so to speak, which culminated in the publication of the third edition of the Roman Missal, which we use today. Then, there is his pivotal role in the fall of Communism in Poland and across Eastern Europe. The list goes on.

Of course, we at Ruah Woods are especially indebted to him for his Theology of the Body, which he gave to the Church at his Wednesday general audiences in the early years of the pontificate as well as the founding of the Pontifical John Paul II Institute for Studies on Marriage and Family and the Pontifical Council for the Family.[2] These gifts were meant to help the Church proclaim the nature and dignity of the human person, love, marriage, and sexuality in these confusing, uncertain times.

For me, personally, I regard myself as a “JP2 Catholic.” I was actually born during the interregnum, i.e., the time between the death of John Paul I and the election of John Paul II. I had little awareness or appreciation of John Paul II until, as a college student, I began to learn more about him and his teachings. My wife and I were blessed to be taught by a priest who earned his doctorate at the John Paul II Institute as we were preparing for marriage. We read John Paul II’s documents on marriage and family at that time and were taught aspects of Theology of the Body in class with other young people. We fell in love with the Church’s vision for marriage and family as expressed through the Pope’s writings. For me, it became my principal inspiration for becoming a Catholic psychologist.

In graduate school, I immersed myself in studying John Paul II’s teaching. As an aspiring Catholic psychologist, I wanted to understand the human person as he did. I studied all of his encyclicals and many of his other papal documents, books, and pre-papal writings. I took graduate seminars on his thought, including Theology of the Body. The more I read of his teaching, the more I wanted to know, and the more I fell in love with this man. He became for me a spiritual and theological mentor. Even more, as I read his thought, I felt a closeness to him. He became a father-figure for me who was teaching me how to see the world, how to live, and how to be a Catholic man in the Third Millennium.

Even today, I regularly read and re-read his writings for my own personal and professional enrichment.[3] I pray to him daily, seeking his intercession to be the man, son, husband, father, and psychologist I am called to be. He is my teacher, my guide, my father, and my friend. For the last 10 years or so, I have been blessed to serve as an adjunct professor at the Washington, DC branch of the John Paul II Institute. When I go to Washington to teach, I always make a visit to the St. John Paul II National Shrine to visit the museum of his life and venerate his relic. Those visits move me to tears of gratitude. Truly, I would not be who I am today – perhaps not even Catholic – without the life, witness, and teaching of Pope St. John Paul II. With deep affection, happy birthday, Papa!

[1] John Paul II, apostolic constitution Fidei depositum.

[2] The Pope officially founded these two new entities on May 13, 1981, the same day he was shot by his would-be assassin, Mehmet Ali Agca. May 13, of course, is the feast of Our Lady of Fatima who had given the three children of Fatima a vision of a pope being gunned down decades earlier. John Paul II believed that he was saved by Mary’s hand.

[3] Currently, I am working my way through his general audiences from the years after Theology of the Body during which he gave a systematic catechesis on all the articles of the Creed.

Posts

Front Desk Hours

Blog

News